So the MRI wasn’t nearly as bad as I had thought it would be. My neighbor has them yearly and she gave me the low down. The worst bit is lying in exactly the same position for 40 minutes with an IV thing in your arm and every part of your body suddenly deciding to get an itch! I was facing the ground, desperately trying not to drool but at least I couldn’t see how close the machine was around me and they gave me ear-plugs to wear for the noise. And therein lies the gift! Steve, my husband has a bit of a snoring problem and for many years, I have been wearing earplugs at night (along with sharpened elbows for a good old jab in the ribcage!). Now for those of you not facing this problem, I am sure you do not know that earplugs come in all shapes and sizes and some work way better than others. The ones I had used for many years suddenly disappeared from the shelves of every pharmacy I have been in and let me tell you, I have been hunting high and low for those damn things for quite some time. But guess what they had at the hospital? Yes, my very favorite earplugs and when I expressed my joy at seeing them, they gave me enough to last me a few months! In the face of so much crap, it really is the little things that can make your day.
Which brings me to the question of courage. I have been pondering it a lot in the face of the fear that has been my travelling buddy over these past weeks. Fear is normal with what I am facing and I truly believe my best approach is to neither banish it nor give in to it, but to be at peace with it when at all possible. Today I got an image of holding fear in my hands, like a dove. Somedays that poor bird is getting crushed as I clench my hands tightly, waiting for the results from yet another test. At other times, I am able to open my hands, sometimes just a little, sometimes with arms extended, giving the fear room to fly and for me to feel free.
I came across this great quote on courage that just resonnated so strongly for me:
Courage doesn’t always roar,
Sometimes courage is
the little voice
at the end of the day
that says
I’ll try again tomorrow
So today, my dove is flying free and yes, little voice, I will try again tomorrow.
exquisitely said
another beautiful post, you have just a gift with words
Love the image of the dove and fear.
You’re teaching “us” who are reading your posts, so many lessons on courage, fear, etc.
I love the idea of “nurturing” that fear, accepting that it is a part of you at the moment, and you have to love that part as much as you love your humor.
If we could just always stay in the moment, and honor the fear when it comes in, and honor the flowers when we see them…
it is so difficult for human beings to be present, in the moment, and never in the past or future, where all these other emotions live most of the time.
Today I want you to know that your posts are meaningful not only to you, to release your mind, but at least to me, who’s reading them. There is a lesson in each one and I’m so grateful for that. I’m grateful that there is something so positive in something that seems to negative. I only hope i can honor you back with the same gift you give me every time you leave your words in this site.
Thank you!
xoxo
Laurie
I agree with Laurie- that you have always had a way with words and sharing with others. I love the other post about the air guitar and music- you made me laugh and what better than laughter as the best medicine 🙂 but also music. I myself used music a lot and I mean everyday to help me when I went through my own health issues. This too shall pass is a saying I like when finding myself in a space of doubt, fear etc.